Edge of Reason

The Edge of Reason

Coming into being,
A thing not there yet always there
Crying the pain of the unfeeling to the unfeeling
Screaming aloud the silent sobs of desperation to the silent,
A voice wailing, unheeded
Mourning those who refused to care,
To be cared for
Refusing to be pacified-

Down these quiet noisome hallways, a howling,
Shrieking pain,
Audible vocalization of garbled speech,
Giving utterance to the unutterable,
These garbled bits of emotion
Psychic bits of disarrayed emotions, sputtering
Struggling to find expression in the unutterable
My coming into being-

Pain is the emollient gurgling through these rippling shards
Of shredded tissue burning in the aftermath of the folly
Through these pathways of sorrow;
My joy is the fulfillment of their sorrow,
Their sorrow the assurance of my being,
When the madness blows over
At the point of stoppage of time
When the intensity of sorrow
Blurs the boundary between reality and the nonspecific
Then I am-

Pushing reality into the glaze of the thick and syrupy haze,
That suspended state of non-ceasing angst
Motion, emotion, being stilled, coagulating
Forming scabs to still the flow of ruinous meaningless existence
The loss of meaning in the midst of formative knowledge in progress
At the bottom of human excesses a separation occurring-

I come into being,
A thing in formation, self defining,
A constant, variously represented,
A voice in formative definition
I am the absence of chaos,
The point beyond chaos,
Exigency beyond the norm of intolerance
The replacement of turbulence
Coming only in the work of disarray
The chorus of human angst-

The hum that is of subdued intensity,
A coming into being of a thing,
Of everything repugnant to man
Finding expression in its purest form
Beyond the limits of endurance-

Long in evolving,
Sustained beyond acceptance,
That addiction that destroys in its forbidden pleasure
A thing attached to one and all,
Emotions unbound, let loose,
neither to place, person or situation,
Yet all affecting-

Touching, infecting, punishing, torturing, tormenting
A scouring that purifies
Substance undefined,
Beyond reason and reality,
Damnation by the non feasibly existent-

Infectious, tainting, tarnishing,
A thing sprung out,
Filling, unfulfilling, emptied out, emptying
Pushing, beyond the limits of possibility,
Indiscernible,
Broken barriers,
Impossibility come into being
I am the being-

Being, beings, being there and ravishing all,
Changing all,
All that is changed, I change
Between fore and aft, beyond, nothing in between,
Desperation is the beginning,
The emptiness stands in-between,
Beyond desperation,
Losing control is barely pre-desperation,
That softening before the beginning-

Trashing, thriving momentarily
In-situ; you on the edge,
Tottering over the abyss
Tumbling down when chaos begins to make sense
Senseless
Emptied out
I, coming to fill. filling-

The sense, controlling senselessness,
The formative blocks of reason collapsing,
Structures disassembling,
Dissolving into the inconceivable,
Beyond sense, meaning and the identifiable
I am come into being
At your permissible request-

Being is a state of existence,
I come from beyond existence,
Beyond, is after all you are used to ceases,
Sense then is senseless,
Emotions are meaningless,
Beyond, that is when I come into being-

Laughter, grunting, crying, moaning,
Wheezing, expiation, expectoration, expression
Sneezing, gasping, coughing, tittering, bursts, burps,
Shaking, staring, open decomposition of dignity
Dissolution into non-entities, untidiness, barring all
Without shame, emotions or regard for others
Incidences of inconsequence-

Scraped of all things human
Frailty dissolved in a puddle of innocence denied-

Your emotions are irrelevant in my rarified universe;
My redefined universe of purity reversed,
Your pain, your sorrow, your wailing
The depths of your emotions pan out in this void of existence,
Meaning is non existent,
From your point of view,
In my view-

Your highs, your lows, your tantrums, your ecstasies,
Your tantrums, your self-pitying, being pitied,
Your laughter of contentment, of ridicule, of the self and others,
Your short lived joys, your extended sorrows,
Your widening sorrows in the wake of departing joy,
Your tears melting away your momentary joy
Your fears,
Sudden awakening, awareness,
They have no meaning to me-

These are signs,
Indications of my presence,
In your human state of enabled emotional perception,
I take away your awareness after you’ve been made aware,
Of a new state of being,
I come in,
Entering you,
Shattering your world view,
Worlds redefined, melting and merging
Till the one is void in the void-

Then, I lift you beyond the self, yourself,
Tearing you from your frail roots of prior assumptions,
Firmly rooted in practice,
I take away normalcy and tear away that frail shed of made-believe reality of normalcy,
What is normal when the roots of meaning have been weeded out?

Taking you one level up,
Above or beneath anything you ever knew before,
Before and now are two separate states of being,
Now is beyond conceptualization in “before”
I take you beyond anything you have ever known and understood,
To me all is the same, what was and is and ought to be
Are nullified in me,
There is only the now, now that I come into being-

I churn the excited flesh,
Stirring the soul,
Tearing apart the embittered spirit,
Your emotional bile,
That poisons your entirety with a poison,
A bitterness of meaninglessness beyond compare,
Listless in your vileness,
My sweet elixir of eternal life,
Bitter is the taste of my presence,
That takes away your taste of life,
Delicacy, being delicate, fragility, all things fragile,
Your emotions, that frail assumptions of a state of feeling and discernment,
Shreds of discarded reality
Tearing away, being torn, in the gust of might presences-

Frail assumptions of humanness,
I shred with little regard or afterthought
I leave no emotions or the memory of them thereof,
Just the empty bitterness that fills,
I am singularly poised on one extreme of eternity,
The other end of which I seek not for it does not exist,
Not in my world, I have only one awareness; of myself
Everything else is an extension of what I am-

Though I flailed your bleeding flesh,
You let me gain ascendancy,
Bit by bit, your foolishness, your stubborn nature,
Your assumption of independence,
That deceptive delicate emotion of yours,
Let madness rule reason,
Till your reason became a deception
That sucked out reality
Filling you with a presence beyond compare,
You ruler of the mind, you tied your reason,
Letting loose something beyond your comprehension,
A mighty presence that gains ascendancy
Taking you, beyond yourself-

I am come,
A thing eternal,
A presence dreaded,
Running wild in my containment,
Beyond the self
Without a self
Come to take possession
Far beyond anything you can dare comprehend-

I am hooked
Anchoring
Pinning studs of fine points into you,
I refuse to let go,
Till every nerve and sense ending is secured and drained,
Emptied and tied down, emptying into me,
I take you on a ride of eternal denial,
Acknowledging that which is beyond reason,
Yet, only by reason can be perceived
Has come into being,
My presence, just come into being-

The Servant of the Lord

“Here is my servant, whom I uphold,
My chosen one in whom I delight;
I will put my Spirit on him
And he will bring justice to the nations.
He will not shout or cry out,
Or raise his voice in the streets.
A bruised reed he will not break,
And a smoldering wick he will not snuff out.
In faithfulness he will bring forth justice;
He will not falter or be discouraged
Till he establishes justice on earth.
In his law the islands will put their hope.
This is what the Lord says-
He who created the heavens and stretched them out,
Who spread out the earth
And all that comes out of it,
Who gives breath to its people,
And life to those who walk on it:
“ I will take hold of your hand.
I will keep you and will make you
To be a covenant for the people
And a light for the Gentiles,
To open eyes that are blind
To free captives from prison
And to release from the dungeon those who sit in darkness.

I am Jehovah;
That is my name,
I will not give my glory to another
Or my praise to idols.
See, the former things have taken place,
And new things I declare;
Before they spring into being
I announce them to you

Isaiah 42